Understanding Life

"Space- the final frontier. These are the voyages of the star ship Enterprise." These were the opening words of my favourite tv show Star Trek. I grew up watching Captain Kirk fight for what he believed in, willing to die for it, I didn't realise that that was not how adult's really behaved. That fighting for what you believe in, wanting to live on your terms without stepping on someone else's. That it was okay if I didn't believe in God, that as long as I didn't hurt someone else's sentiments it was okay. It was okay if I wanted to be a part of a space shuttle crew - that people would like and appreciate that; but also be supportive.

"Contradictions do not exist. Whenever you think you are facing a contradiction, check your premises. You will find that one of them is wrong."

So busy was I living that fantasy that i forgot to check the premises of that assumption. When i said it was okay if I didn't believe in God as long as I didn't step on someone else's toes, I forgot that here people want to put their toes right under your feet and get hurt if you so much as say or do anything different from the way they do for their God.
I didn't realise that when they said - ladke aur ladki mein koi fark nahi hai - they didn't mean it. What it actually means is this - Women should be school teachers or lecturers, even doctors if they want to be the typical professional. But whatever they choose to do in life they must always remember that husband and inlaws are Gods. She must be back home before the husband and even though she might be just as tired as him be prepared to do all the household chores like cooking, cleaning etc. Essentially, they forgot to tell me that working women were not just that, they were Super women too.

Look at how easily a Muthalik gets away with making statements about women and how they dress and go out of the house to work. Am sure politicians like Muthalik realise that there are things that only build up your public image - whether they get appreciated or they elicit angry responses and pink chadhis from women.

But are we as common people any different in our approach towards working women? How many of us think that a woman working in a full time private job either does not do her job well or she ignores the husband and her duties towards him and the household?

How many times have I been asked who cooks or who cleans? How many people bother to ask who does well at office?
How many times do people think that its okay to get sarcastic and rude and mean simply because i dont do all the pujas and are usually not aware of all the rituals and customs?
How many people think its okay to tell me that since we don't have children our lives are incomplete?
That since akshay is considering going away to US and i might stay back till the time he finishes most of his education - he might be trying to get rid of me or me of him?
That since I don't treat akshay like a Semi-god I am a horrible horrible woman, wife, daughter-in-law and a horrible human being too.

All i have to say in my defence is simply this - Akshay and I are fine with the way we are with each other. We trust each other and understand each other pretty well too. For now I have only one life to live and its going to be a short one - i'd like to live it up and live it on my own terms. In all my next birth's i promise to keep in mind what others would prefer. :-)

So long my friends and thanks for all the fish. am off to exploring and understanding the universe.